Eye Contact

Stop staring into my soul… please.

I’ll be straight up with you, I’m only writing this because I’m attempting to write an essay but I’m not really in the writing mood. So this will hopefully get me going… or not. Probably not. But it’s worth a shot.

Sorry about the unimaginative title, not that you care, but at least you know exactly what the post is about. Let’s just hope I have enough to say about it. So when we talk to people, we tend to look them in the eye right? Well you do, but I do not. I know there are other people like me out there but I truly struggle to make eye contact. And I’m not quite sure why, so let me try and figure this beast out.

People say that we should make eye contact to show the other person we’re listening to them. Because if they’re talking and we’re looking at some guy trying his luck with a female way out of his league, although it’s hilarious, it could be considered as rude. But I actually find it easier to listen to people when I’m not looking at them. If I’m making eye contact with someone, I’m trying so hard to keep that eye contact that I just completely forget that they’re talking to me. I literally just switch off. If you ever want to try some juju on me, now you know what to do.

But what amazes me is that everyone else just seems to be comfortable with it. Why am I always the odd one out? Even when I’m not making eye contact I can just feel the person I’m talking to staring at me and it’s really unsettling. Obviously it’s not their fault, they’re just being normal, I just need to get my act together. What do I find so uncomfortable about it? I have no idea, I mean everyone does it, it’s a normal thing so why can’t I do it. I’ve tried that trick when you look in between their eyes or at their nose but then I just think they’re going to ask “Why the f*ck are you looking at my nose?” and that’s even more awkward.

And I try, I really do but I’ll get to about 2 seconds of some really greatly executed eye contact but just have to stop looking. There’s something about someone looking directly into your eyes that’s a bit existential… if that makes sense. Like why do we even look at the eyes? Why not the mouth or the hair or the ears? To be fair I find it slightly easier making eye contact with people I know well but still even then I only last about 5 seconds, still an improvement.

When we look each other in the eyes what exactly are we looking at? Are we just looking at the eyes, into our souls or just our reflection in their pupil? These are some pretty deep questions about something so trivial and normal. You know how people say you can tell a lot about how someone is feeling just by their eyes. Really? The only thing I can tell is if you’ve had a late night, are drunk or are high. And that’s it. But you know what bugs me about this whole thing, I notice when other people struggle to make eye contact and it bugs me. How hypocritical. So this is probably what everyone else thinks about me… *sigh*.

I think everyone should just get into the habit of closing their eyes when they talk.

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