No, I haven’t won an Oscar… not yet anyways.
I realised that I hadn’t posted in a while. I hope you weren’t too worried about me, I swear I’m fine. Who am I kidding? You definitely don’t care but I’m going to try and post a bit more regularly, which actually means nothings going to change and I’m actually going to be worse than before.
I think as we get older we feel stupid for having feelings that we associate with childhood and teenage-hood. But can something really be stupid if its the norm for humans in general? These are feelings that are universal and those strangers you see walking down the street have probably felt most of the “childish” feelings you’re feeling. One of these feelings is acceptance. Hang on… is that a feeling? People can “feel” accepted right? Yes, they can. But anyway I think it’s human nature for us to want to feel accepted.
As we all know though, we can’t force feelings, especially a feeling that relies so heavily on the people around us. Acceptance is complicated and can only be truly felt over a period of time. But what does it take for people to feel accepted? How do we physically go from being outsider to being included into a particular environment, culture or society? Now this can be seen as something pretty drastic. Say you were moving countries and moving to a small town where everyone knows each other basically. Chances are it’s going to take a while for you to feel fully integrated into that community. There may be language barriers or culture differences that you will have to get accustomed to. But having said this I’ve been thinking about the concept recently and it doesn’t have to be something this radical.
It’s no secret that everyone living on this planet wants to feel accepted. We can never really be us if we don’t have that feeling of acceptance from the people around us. Having said this though a huge part of being accepted is being yourself. Which is actually a bit contradictory. I feel as though a lot of people in my life don’t accept the way I am. People will tell you they’re accepting but when it really comes down to it they’re actually not. People subconsciously try to change the people around them and that doesn’t make them a bad person it’s just the way we are wired. We want people to share our views and opinions as then we feel a lot more reassured. I mean this is how arguments start right, when we’re unwilling to accept the point of view of someone else.
Part of any successful relationship is just knowing that people are the way they are and you have no right to change that. But also why would you, you’re with this person or friends with them because you like who they are? So if you try and change that surely that undermines the whole point of the relationship. With acceptance comes a deep understanding, that sounds a bit pretentious of me but I literally just thought of that now and it’s kind of true. If you accept that your friend doesn’t do drugs, if you accept your boyfriend likes Gillmore Girls then your actions and decisions will be informed by this, then everyone’s happy. Obviously this means that there are some compromises along the way but that’s part of life I guess.
I did say that acceptance is down to other people but in fact… wait can I change my opinion half way through a blog post? Yes, yes I can. Acceptance is also an internal thing, just accepting yourself. Accepting the fact that you are you and that is totally okay, you or anyone around you shouldn’t have to or want to change that. The faster you accept yourself the quicker others will. And remember not everyone is going to accept you which is also fine because there are many people that will and those are the people who matter.
It’s also important for us though to try and be as accepting as others as possible. Accepting them both physically and mentally. Why would we deprive someone of a feeling that almost all humans want to experience. I think people forget the impact they can have on an individual’s life because with just a simple word or phrase you can totally make that person’s day and it’s so easy. No one in life is above or below you, we all have the right to feel accepted and no one has the right to deny someone of that. Be you and accept and appreciate others.