Why I’m Boycotting Jeans

Restriction is for free trials and lite versions of stuff…

I have recently decided to completely remove jeans from my wardrobe. Why? That’s an interesting question, but the real question is “Why haven’t I done this already?”. Jeans are just the go to lower half of body wear. But really why? I think we’ve all been heavily deluded.

For starters, this ones more for guys. The damn things are so tight. I mean skinny jeans are like the thing now. If we see someone with like bootcut we’d question if they were from this decade. But anyway they don’t leave much to the imagination. The first struggle is getting the damn things on, And jeans are not a very nice material. Well if you’re cheap like me and get them from Primark. The friction caused as you tire yourself trying to pull them above your knee. And then you’ve got a whole half a leg to go. And that part of the leg is fatter than the other half.

You finally get them on thinking the struggle is over but then you realise that they’re not even comfortable. At least the pain you went through to get them on is temporary but that uncomfortable-ness you’re feeling now is going to last as long as you wear them for. So now you have two choices. You’re already in the damn things and getting them on was more trouble than its worth. So you can either take them off and go through all that pain in reverse. Or just live with the fabric riding up into your crotch.

Let’s move on. As if jeans weren’t already asking a lot of you, they just couldn’t stop there,. They’re now asking you to wear something extra to secure them in place. It’s just attention seeking if you ask me. I mean you can get jeans that don’t require belts but for me anyway the majority of mine need them. So on top of paying top dollar for these jeans (they are expensive) you’re now required to fork out even more for a piece string. TROLLED.

And that’s just the start. Getting belts on are a hassle. You’re literally jumping through hoops for it. Then you get to the end and realise that the belt has twisted and is now the wrong way so now have to waste more time twisting it back to the right way. And some belts don’t even do their job properly. I don’t know if this is just a “me” thing but the buttons always seem to fall below the belt. if that makes sense. So I have to constantly put it back into place so people don’t think I’m about to expose myself all the time.

I’ve just realised that jeans are just not worth it. And they all look the bloody same. No ones going to compliment you on your jeans. OH ACTUALLY I JUST REMEMBERED. WHY ARE TORN JEANS BECOMING A THING? I am fearful that I will fall into the trap and look like I went 10 rounds with that bear from The Revenant. I don’t get it now, nor do I want to get it. Torn jeans are a big no. I wear trousers so people can not see my legs. This kinda defeats the purpose. And it’s all becoming a bit ridiculous now. At least make it look like the tears are there intentionally.

I mean I only wear jeans out. Every time I get home I always have to change so this day was pretty much pending. Track pants FTW.

Having said all this, jeans are the only piece of clothing that you can wear multiple times without washing. No? Is that just me?

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